totally off-topic

I know, this isn't pertinent. but if i don't share this with the universe, i will exploooode. i got these pictures from an event--i've actually been getting pictures from this person (the guy in the sparkly vest, as you'll see) for a while now, but this is easily the creepiest set of pictures yet. the captions are, of course, my own. prepare to be weirded out.

i shall call her... greendress. i do not know her name. just as well, because i'd have a helluva time being as mercilessly cruel if i had half a notion as to who she was.

Greendress is flexible!

Greendress is...bending!

greendress is, well, bending a different way this time!

greendress saucyface has less cellulite than me. i hate you, greendress.

greendress is whimsical!

greendress is nonplussed to be consorting with people so obviously far beneath her.

Oh, you, greendress...

Greendress is humoring her many fans.

and there you go. and that's not even all the pictures that this man has sent me! i don't ask for these things. they just come to me. so, internet, now they're yours. congrats.